Trains & Automobiles: Zhumadian Style

On Wednesday, we woke up early to take a train ride to the town where Seraphina's orphanage was located in order to apply for a passport. We hadn't done this in the past so this was a new adventure for the Smiths.

Sera's orphanage is in Suiping, south of Zhengzhou where we have been staying this week. Zhumadian is a bit further south, but being the hub city, it was the location of the government offices. (On a side note, we were told Sera spent some time in Kaifeng for some speech therapy. The significance here is that Leah is from Kaifeng.)

We took a subway from the Hilton to the train station and then boarded the train for an hour ride. Sera did great the entire time, enjoying some chips and "browsing" the magazine in the seat pocket. Apparently she has watched adults read magazines so for her this involves methodically turning to each page continuously (never stopping to actually look at any content) until she reaches the end and then putting the magazine away. Speed reader.

Our guide, Rita (in picture above in red coat) was rushing us from vehicle to vehicle which was somewhat stressful combined with a child who wanted to walk but couldn't because of the speed expected of us. However, the hustle and bustle was necessary since we were constantly stopped by police to check passports. Whatever conference is coming next week to Zhengzhou has everyone on high alert. Apparently Americans adopting Chinese kids fits every profile in the book.

Leah's first breakdown of the day was when we tried to climb into a taxi to get from the train station in Zhumadian to the passport office. Angela climbed in first while I held Na. She broke into tears and started yapping. When I finally got in to the taxi myself, Rita said Na wanted Angela and was scared of me. Strange, as she plays with me all the time in the hotel room, with or without Angela in sight. Personally I think Na wants the three of us to be around at all times. While she manages with just one of us, whenever there is a perception that one of us is "leaving", she gets visibly upset. This makes it interesting when one of us has to use the bathroom.

At the passport office, we met up with Na's caregivers (in black and gray coats above). They are the ones that brought her to the Hilton on Monday and were needed to sign the paperwork making the transfer complete. One of the ladies gave Sera a bag with some of her clothes as well as a doll which was a going away present. Sera did great with the short reunion and gave each of them a hug when they parted ways.

Last stop before the return trip was a trip to the orphanage where two of the other children in our adoption group were from. To get there, we had to take a minivan through town. I wish I could have gotten video of the drive as no words can do justice to how the Chinese drive. Lines are wasted on these people. We wove between lanes often and many times would straddle two lanes if the driver was unsure which gave the best advantage. At stop lights, he would pull up on the right of another driver already in the shoulder, then rev the engine just before the light changed and merge into the shoulder before merging back in to an actual lane. And merging consisted of a flick of the turn signal before moving to left or right -- no need to use the mirrors -- bigger vehicle (or bigger balls) usually gained the pole position. To get to orphanage we had to take a few side streets, these were unpaved with manhole covers sticking no less than 8 inches above the ground (or sometimes 8 inches underground). The minivan would weave between obstacles as necessary, sometimes playing chicken with oncoming traffic. If two vehicles got too close, a simple "beep-beep" would be made simultaneous to a quick tap in the brakes. At one point I thought we were driving through a war zone as we had to navigate huge piles of rubble as if on some giant moto-cross track. At one point we were driving on a wide sidewalk; another we were driving through a mud puddle so wide I was convinced I would be pushing before we made it across. I have been to most every big city in America and not one comes remotely close to how the Chinese drive.

Once at the orphanage, we had about 15 minutes to take a quick tour. This was apparently one of the better funded institutions in China and it makes me wonder about the others. The hall ways were cold and had that institutional smell of ammonia mixed with urine. The rooms were nice enough with fairly new cribs and a small area with rubber mats, a wall mirror and a TV. A few toys were scattered about. Not much to see aside from the pictures lining the walls of the children who had been adopted and were in photos with their forever families.

The return trip was more of the same with a stop at a police station to sign one other document. The second hand cigarette smoke in the tiny building was so bad, I opted to step back outside to inhale the polluted air instead.

Another week in China still? God bless us.

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Likes & Dislikes

Today was a fairly calm day. We had to take a bus to two government buildings to get the adoption finalized by the Chinese government and to have the forms notarized. After that we were on our own for the afternoon while most of the families went to apply for their children's passports. We will join two other families to do the same thing tomorrow which will require leaving the hotel at 7 AM to travel by subway, train and taxi to the remote town Seraphina's orphange is located in. We anticipate that being an emotional day, especially after learning of one of Seraphina's dislikes as detailed below.

1st American meal: BK nuggets and fries

Things Seraphina likes

1. Watermelon. I always thought "congee" was a porridge-like dish made from rice. I am beginning to think it is the Chinese word for watermelon though as this is the 2nd child that prefers the juicy, red fruit to a bowl of white mush.
2. Touching the ceiling. The ceiling in the hotel room is about 10 feet up. Sera constantly asks to be lifted up so that she can touch it with her hands. I'm basically doing chest presses to the tune of 10 per hour. The laughter however makes the pain a little more bearable that doing the same with a kettle bell.
3. Taking a bath. This girl tries to climb into the tub whenever she is in the bathroom. We have to repeatedly tell her that she has to wait until before bed time. She has taken more baths in the past two days (2) than most of my kids prefer to take in a week.
4. Balloons. I thought they would be a nice distraction for little cost after seeing another parent with them on Gotcha day. Unfortunately I made the mistake of blowing one up and then stretching the material to make the ballon "whine" as the air was released. I thought it would annoy her but instead she now insists I blow up balloons over and over so that she can make them whine herself thereby annoying her parents. Well played, Sera.
5. Cleaning up. Grandma will be pleased. Seraphina is very good about putting one toy away before getting another one out. When she eats a piece of candy for finishes a water bottle, the is good about putting the trash in the basket. When she gets ready for bed, she folds are her clothes and puts them in the suitcase first. We're hoping her habits will rub off on her "roommate" (aka sister) when we get home.

Things Seraphina does not like

1. Look but don't touch. She is mesmerized by the Christmas tree in the hotel lobby with decorative presents stacked all around the base. We allow her to look at the ornaments but will not let her touch them since she is reluctant to let them go once she has them. Keeping her from touching resulted in a minor breakdown today as she tugged and loudly voiced her displeasure, forcing me to remove her from the lobby.
2.  Downtime. If she's not sleeping, Na-na wants to be active. Sitting still is not an option (unless she's eating). Needless to say, Angela and I are often trying to sneak a little nap time in whenever possible. We are happy when 7:30 PM rolls around which is bed time. We're quite glad the orphanage instilled that habit in her.
3. Buses/travel. Today we got our first tears from Sera. She completely lost it as Angela held her and stepped on to the bus to go to the government buiding. It took several minutes to calm her down. We assume she associates something bad with going places, and expect we will have a repeat performance tomorrow as we head to her "home town". Hopefully she will look back one day and see that it was a "trip" that brought her home to her forever family.

That's it. I was thinking of a Top 5 list for the good and the bad, but thus far there really isn't anything she doesn't like. Not to jinx ourselves, but aside from her medical needs, this has been the easiest adoption yet. Maybe we're just getting comfortable with the process after 3 previous adoptions, or maybe she's just that angelic. In any event, I think "Seraphina" was an applicable name.

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On a side note, I was reviewing some of the posts from our trip to adopt Leah which included our stay in the same city we are in now. In it I mention how blue the skies are in Zhengzhou. My how things have changed in the past 7 years. The skies are now filled with a yellowish-gray haze that persists all day. Air pollution is thick and you can practically taste it. I once thought the Asians wearing face masks with a little ridiculous, but I would be open to wearing one this week. We try not to go out too often because it is so bad.

I also have to grin when I read in the same post about the other families back then adopting children with "bigger" issues than Leah had -- among them were 'adopting an older child' or 'one with missing limbs'. I suppose God was laughing when I typed that, thinking "if you only knew". Check and check.

Tomorrow (Wednesday) looks to be a busy day. It may be Thursday before I have a chance to post again so go back and review some of the older posts from past adoptions. It's interesting to see what's changed and what has stayed the same. Like a cream-colored henley that I wore when we adopted Leah 7 years ago which I packed again for this trip.

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Gotcha!

Monday was Gotcha Day. The day we would get to meet Seraphina for the first time in person. A day filled with nervous excitement, wondering how our new daughter might react when she sees us as well as how we would likely react when we met her.

As usual, Angela and I were up before dawn. I'm not sure if we're having a hard time adjusting to the new time zone or if the events of the next few weeks just have us jittery (probably a little of both). In any event, we began getting ready around 4AM which gave us time to chat with our boys back home for a bit before heading down for breakfast. We shouldn't fail to mention how thankful we are for friends to look after our children while we are overseas to adopt our 4th. The Riders, Cannons and McCormicks have been most generous in opening their doors (and hearts) to watch after our kids. While the kids (and us) are not totally happy about being apart for two weeks, we could not have asked for better friends to get them through the separation time.


After a delicious buffet which included mounds of veggies for me (what is this strange craving I have for healthy food?) and a chocolate-covered donut with sprinkles for Angela, we returned to our room to grab the few things we would need for the exchange. The plan was to take a bus to the meeting location at 9 AM. After all the families had assembled in the lobby, our guide informed us that the building we were supposed to be going to was under renovation so the meetings were being re-routed. Instead, the kids were bring brought to our hotel where they would meet us for the first time on the floor we were staying. Strange that this information wasn't known until the last minute, but great that we would not be in a business-like setting while trying to bond with the new additions to our families.

All the families sat together in the hallway waiting for the children to arrive. We were told that they would be coming at various times since they were from various orphanages. The majority of the children arrived before Serpahina so we had the opportunity to observe as others met their kids for the first time. I thought Angela was going to break down on a number of occasions (and rightly so), but she managed to hold her emotions in check as she offered to take pictures of each family as they embraced their children.

The hallway was a bit chaotic when we heard commotion from the elevator area. I caught a glimpse of Seraphina just before the social workers corralled the new arrivals back around the corner so that the children could be properly introduced. When Seraphina and her two guardians turned the corner, Na made eye contact with Angela and ran straight for her shouting "Mama!". She turned to look at her care takers as she pointed toward me and said "baba" (daddy) and then opened the Hello Kitty backpack she had brought with her and pulled out the photo album we had sent ahead of time. She flipped through every single page pointing at us and our kids, each time naming them correctly as mommy, daddy, sister and brothers. I couldn't tell through tears whether Angela was sobbing by this time so I assumed she was managing on her own.

Angela also had brought a backpack filled with goodies and handed Na a stuffed panda bear that her and Leah had picked out. Na was excited to receive it and gave it a big hug. Then she reached into her pack and pulled out some hard candies and eagerly insisted Angela and I both have one. After she was sure we were "fed" she grabbed another bag of cookies, had her caregivers help to open them, and proceeded up and down the hallway offering each child one. It was overwhelming to see her jump into caregiver mode herself, stopping to "console" any crying children (although amazingly there were very few). By this point Angela and I were both laughing as we tried to keep up with her. But even though she was very friendly to everyone in the hallway, she never mistook any of the other adults for "mama" and "baba", always calling us by name as she made eye contact.

Once the initial paperwork was signed and the fees and gifts were handed out, Na's caretakers prepared to leave. It was obvious they were as emotional as we were, and while they forced smiles knowing the child they brought would be well cared for, it was obvious that Na-na (as they called her) would be missed in the orphanage. Our new daughter called out to them in Chinese as she waved. Angela heard the word "mama" and thought Na was referring to the caretaker as her former mother, but a guide told us that Na was actually saying, "I found my mama so it's OK for you to go now." Another round of teary eyes for everyone.

We thought at this point Sera might become sad as the adults she had known all this time left without her, but she seemed very much calm and content knowing she was with her mom and dad. She continued to "check" on the other kids while we were in the hallway, handing out snacks as needed. She happily sat with both Angela and I on numerous occasions while playing with the activity books we had brought for her. The only time she had a remotely negative reaction is when I picked her up and kissed her on the cheek. She wrinkled up her nose and made a disgusted look and pointed at my beard. She started chattering in Chinese and reached for Angela and touched her smooth cheek before pointing at my face again. I assume she is not a fan of scratchy kisses. For now she only lets Angela pick her up, but had no problem playing with me. She enjoyed sitting on my back as I did a few pushups in the hotel room in lieu of a workout in the gloom.

At no point the rest of the day did the mood change for Na-na. She played with the sticker book. She cooed over the pink blanket Leah made for her. She put together two puzzles with help from Angela. She pulled snacks out of her pack continuously and seemed to always have something to chew on. She drank water from plastic bottles often. She asked for help when she had to use the bathroom. She played with every electronic device she could get her hands on, taking pictures of Angela and I (not bad), "fixing" the cord we removed from the hotel phone (uh-oh), and turning on my phone then navigating to/playing Angry Birds (wait, how'd you do that?!). At lunch, she ate some buttered bread, a part of Angela's sandwich and a healthy amount of french fries. This girl knows how to use fries as spoons for ketchup and ate every last drop of the sweet, red stuff the waitress brought us.

She does not like it when other kids act mean toward her. One child tried to push her away when she reached out to touch his toy. She made a mean look and rattled off something in Chinese, demanding to be held. But she was over it and moving on to the next activity once comforted. We are told she does not like spicy food and is allergic to kiwi. I guess Leah gets all the kiwi to herself when we get home.

She is very good about sharing and cleaning up behind herself. We can't tell how much Chinese she knows as she always repeats what we say whether in Chinese or English. She seems to have already learned some English -- when we say to throw something in the trash, she knows right where to put it. Before bed, she happily climbed into the bath tub and allowed Angela to bathe her - including washing her hair - without a peep. I'm not sure my older kids wouldn't still complain about shampoo in their eyes!

Having adopted two children from China previously, I am preparing myself for the "let down" -- the point at which the new reality sets in and Seraphina recognizes that things are different. That is how it went with the other kids. That's how I imagine I would be in a similar situation. But so far, it doesn't seem like Na-na (the name we are continuing to use for now) will have problems. She has been fantastic thus far, going to bed rather easily and sleeping through the night.

We will need to address the deformed limb quickly. I originally thought we would need to wait for awhile, but if she continues to be so agreeable, I see no reason to put off the inevitable. It is obvious she will benefit from surgery and the prosthetic leg. Also, she is *TINY*. I can not believe she is seven years old. I'd swear she was 4 or 5 and if I thought we could get away with it, I might be tempted to say she's 5 in public and deal with the ramifications later in life.

But for now, life is better than we could have hoped. We have a new daughter who seems very happy to have found her forever family and we are down to 11 days before returning home to be reunited with the other three children we miss dearly. If all continues like this, the Smiths should have a very merry Christmas.

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Security on Lockdown in Zhengzhou

Summary: Long day of travel Sunday with little to eat and a whole lot of security checks.

We left Beijing after a quick breakfast. The security checkpoint at the airport took almost an hour. Apparently they are using Windows 98 on the baggage check -- I'm guessing based on the blue screen of death I noticed on the large CRT monitor when they finally let me get my things following a VERY frisky lady patting me down. At least she was wearing latex gloves.

The flight to Zhengzhou was uneventful after that and gave us a chance to meet two more couples who were adopting older children like us. We were the only three families flying to the next stop; the others opted to leave earlier in the morning to take a high-speed train instead.

After we collected our bags, we headed for the airport exit to meet our new guide when one of our members was stopped by local police. She looked in our direction which led to all of us being pulled aside for a spot check of passports and a general grilling of our reason for being in this city with its severe air pollution. After several minutes of scrutinizing our visas and requiring phone numbers and addresses of every place we'd be stopping while in town, they (seemingly reluctantly) let us go.

We piled into a small bus for the 1-hour ride to the downtown Hilton hotel. About 30 minutes into the trip, we passed a toll booth and on the opposite side, the bus was waved down by military police. I really wanted to get a picture of these men dressed in black with bullet proof vests and automatic rifles, but based on the way the heated conversation with the bus driver went and how they stormed on the bus demanding to see passports, I admit I was just a little intimidated. We would later ask our guide about China's concern for terrorism and she claimed threats like that didn't exist in China -- I can see why with that show of force towards 3 couples looking to adopt.

When we arrived in the city, our first stop was at a bank (yes, on a Sunday afternoon). We needed to exchange money for the gifts and fees required on Monday morning when we finally meet Sera in person. Carrying the amount of money we were required to bring in cash has been a major cause of stress for me. It's not every day you walk around with roughly NINE GRAND in your backpack. And with a conversion rate of roughly 6:1, I was none to pleased to be handed a tower of 100¥ bills (the largest denomination available in China) to the tune of 42,600¥. I felt like I was holding enough money in my hands to buy an entire apartment building in Zhengzhou while Chinese locals were standing in lines beside me to get money for dinner. Needless to say, I was sweating as I tried to pile the large stack of bills into my backpack without drawing attention. It may sound weird, but I will be glad to get rid of this money tomorrow so that I don't have to worry about keeping it safe in a strange country!

Once that was done, we finally made it into the Hilton, our home for the next week or so while we get to know Sera and fill out lots of paperwork to get her back home to NC. We had to meet with the entire group (the first time we met many of them) as our new guide went over the itinerary for the next few days as well as what to expect when we meet our new child.

About 30 cents for 6 oz soda

The next stop was in the lobby to meet everyone for a trip to Walmart. Yep, they have Walmart in China, although it only vaguely resembles what we think of in America. There were 3 floors. While some families had to get formula and diapers, we were there to grab a few snacks for the hotel room. We stuck with recognizable brands despite the price being higher than local competition. While there were some really unusual options, the strangest thing we picked up was the cucumber-flavored Pringles.

We passed on the spicy quail eggs

On the way back to the hotel, Angela and I broke off from the American contingent to grab some food at a Subway. It would be the first thing we ate since breakfast in Beijing nearly 10 hours earlier. Stepping into the restaurant was like being back in the states -- the smell of the bread was tantalizing (when's the last time you said that about Subway fare). I have never been so excited to eat a BMT as I was that evening. Yum.

We played it safe with cucumber flavor

Back in the hotel, we ate devoured our sandwiches, chips and a drink while watching a little TV. We laid down on the bed for a little nap around 6:30 PM and ... I just woke up. It's 2 AM here. We'll be meeting Seraphina (and hoping it all goes well) in a little over 6 hours. Nervously looking forward to the introductions.

P.S. We were told that there was going to be a large, international medical conference next week in Zhengzhou and that was the reason for the heightened security. Anyone not local (including Chinese from outside the area) were being checked upon arrival in the city. It appears that the internet connection will be equally scrutinized. While writing this post, my connection has dropped numerous times. Although it can be frustrating dealing with Time Warner or Verizon back home, this trip is a reminder that we really do have it better than most.

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Wangfujing Church, Diocese of Beijing

Our hotel sits right beside a beautiful church. When we passed it last night, there were college-aged kids dancing outside the doors to loud electronica music so we opted not to research further. This afternoon we returned and dodged young men on skateboards to step inside. We found what is certainly a Catholic Church, but we are not sure it is in good standing with the Vatican.

The information board at the front doors (just inside an iron gate) name the Church as Saint Joseph's Church and there is a covered statue of him holding the baby Jesus outside the building. The board mentions adoration from 8 AM to 9 PM during the week as well as an English mass at 4 PM on Sundays. Three Chinese masses are early enough that we could possibly make it before leaving for Zhenghou later tomorrow morning, but without certainty of its validity, we are opting to pass on the opportunity.

Despite the uncertainty, both the outside and inside are impressive. While there are TV screens on most of the ornate columns (which presumably display the prayers/music during the mass) and a gift shop built against the back wall of the worship area, it is obvious that this church was built with great care. While we were inside, there appeared to be a prayer service taking place. It was led by a woman in front of a baldacchino but we were not sure of specifics; no English literature was found in the building. We also noted a young priest exiting the church wearing traditional clericals.

We were troubled to see the apparent disrespect for the church just outside the front doors, but I imagine it would be difficult to enforce reverence in a country where the Church is run (at least in part) by the government. It will be interesting to see if the Catholic Church in China ever returns to full communion with Rome.

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